Quatre pained so Badly
by Nesquick-711
Summary: or pg-13; Quatre has a monster that takes away his pain. please Read and Review.


Author Notes: Hello. My teacher wanted the class to make a power point presentation, and turn it into a story-book (yea.) so I decided to write about Quatre. None of this is story line, it has a bit of the main plot of episodes 24 and 25, but it doesn't mention the main fact that Quatre was so angry at the colonies; because his father died. So don't get all pissed b/c I didn't make it stick to the main plot, okay. It's totally different. Now, with that said.please review! ^_^  
  
Quatre pained so badly. It's a sore, repeated kind of pain. He tried to break the pain, so he wouldn't think of pain any more. He just wanted not to feel as if he was filled with failure.  
  
It's a Thursday night, not dark but dry and windy. He usually worked on the Gundam with Heero and Trowa at night, but he didn't. He walks into his palely lit room and the darkness embraces his senses.  
  
Instead of lying on his bed, he glances at the corner of his room. He walks to the area, sits down and pulls his knees to his chest. Quatre then rests his chin on his knees and tries not to think.  
  
After a while, he wasn't sure if he was dreaming or awake, for he began to feel something creeping next to him. He slowly lifts his head and breaths in softly, and as Quatre exhales, it pushes away. But he holds his breath for a moment so it would come closer to him and inhales again. The particles compress thru his slightly open lips, and harbors within him. As he exhales, it seeps away yet again.  
  
He tries to keep the healing inside of his lungs, but it wanted relief from his filthy, immoral body. Each time he exhales, a bit of his cleanliness leaves from within his heart. He heaved a heavy sigh, and watches as the moonlight from the window illuminate the sweet particles of purity. There was not any purity left in him anymore.  
  
A slight sad smile rests upon his lips. He didn't mean for that to happen.  
  
Quatre swallows a knot that was beginning to form in his throat. At least he doesn't feel all pain now. He wasn't exactly sad, but small tears began to fall down his pale cheeks. His blue eyes remains closed. He was about to meet his nightmare. It was the monster.  
  
It hovered above the purity. The beast chuckle softly at Quatre's undoing. After all the night's he watched Quatre churn with pain, this was the night that he has seen Quatre at his most vulnerable state. The thought of his sadness amused him greatly.  
  
"Please." Quatre whispers, "Leave me alone."  
  
"Open your eyes, so you can see me." The monster's voice creeps his way into Quatre's senses. Quatre tightens his eyes even more. His breathing became ragged. The monster laughs.  
  
"Do you think you can defeat me, Quatre? I've been watching you for the past months, tremble in you filthy heap of sin." He pauses, watching Quatre jerk involuntary. Good, he was getting under his skin. But the monster wanted to see Quatre even more hurt. He wanted to see Quatre die. "There are so many people who watch you Quatre. The watch in horror as you wrench and cry soundlessly for something they thought you had." The monster forces a husky chuckle, "You look innocent, but you are as filthy as dirt. You cannot fool any one, Quatre." His voice deeply taunts Quatre. Quatre doesn't speak. He sits still as he felt the monster lowers, until Quatre is surrounded with him.  
  
"What do you want." The Monster asks, absolutely sure of what Quatre yearned for.  
  
"I." He pauses for a moment, and then grimaces, "I don't want to feel." "Well, well." The monster sneers, "I can help you with that." As soon as he spoke, the monster slams his palm on Quatre's forehead, and Quatre's head crashes against the wall. As a small cry escapes his lungs, the monster then rams his body into Quatre's mouth. The monster spreads his matter throughout Quatre's body.  
  
Quatre fells every cell of his body heightens with numbness as his body churned with the monster inside of him. Quatre clutches the carpet with a death grip around his fingers as the monster continued to pump his way into his body. Quatre wanted to scream out badly because of the ripping away of those horrid emotions out of his body. The sadness of killing all the innocent victims in the war, the engulfing desire he felt for Relena, the brokenness of disappointing so many people, and all the times he wanted to die. He wants to die now. All the things he despised began to feel heightened into an almost unbearable mass of self-loathing. The repulsion of being him self made him cringes deeply. He hated who he had become. He despises even being born. He groans as he felt the particles of the monster continue to slide through is open lips and dissipate into his body. Then he feels an odd heighten emotion of hunger. He jerks, trembles and whimpers, and finally, after he could close his mouth, all is silent.  
  
Then as suddenly, as the monster appeared, Quatre feels his body relax into a pit of nothingness. A bitter calmness sweeps over his lanky frame as he reluctantly opens his eyes. His legs slide down to the carpet. He then lifts his head and groans at the striking absence of pain.  
  
"You like it, don't you." The monster faintly whispers in his subconscious.  
  
Day's past since that experience happened. Each day was routine and Quatre preformed his duties mechanically. Heero glanced at Quatre. Quatre was sitting in his Gundam, staring at the controls. He never seems to be totally there.  
  
The monster didn't speak much, but Quatre knew he was there. For every time Quatre would feel a dreaded emotion of failure, or past memories that charred his happiness deeply, the monster would punish him by inflicting wounds on his arms. They itch so terribly, that he would crawl into a dark corner, and compress his agonizing screams. Quatre imaged him self; licking his wounds like a dog so as he wouldn't scratch. His fingers beg to scratch his tender wounds. Quatre wasn't fooling anyone. Heero and Trowa knew something was wrong. They watch him kill colony after colony, they stare as the lost of innocent victims continue to rise. As much as Trowa didn't want to admit it, he couldn't take it anymore.  
  
"Quatre what's going on?" Quatre is sitting in the Gundam, his breathing irregular. He represses the feelings that his heart wants to yell, but instead he trembles and say's; "Don't come near me. Tell the others to stay away from me. Otherwise, I'll kill them all." Quatre voice trembles and borders on insane. Heero warns him, "Quatre." Trowa proceeds to come to him, but Quatre breaks, "I said, don't come any closer!" They fight, and Quatre bruises Trowa. Trowa is slung into outer space. "Trowa!" Quatre screams. Heero hurls Quatre into the colony's base, and compresses him. "I'm going to kill you." Heero sneers, "Then go ahead and kill me so you can save Trowa!"  
  
Trowa calmly sit in the Gundam, "I just hope something triggers in you head and calms you down."  
  
"Trowa is dead." Quatre whispers faintly, trying to make the thoughts register in his mind. He then feels the monster move within his blood.  
  
Quatre is slammed against the wall. He feels the flesh on his arms aching. He wants to feel.  
  
He slides down the wall and crumbles into a pit of nothing. He wants to feel so badly. But the only thing tangible is his scars. An odd lustful, itch swarms his numbness. He couldn't take it anymore. His wounds want to be relived. They throb painfully and he is beyond the limit of his self-control. He finally digs his fingernails into his skin, damaging his flesh. He wants to feel so badly now that he doesn't care about the blood. The scabs peel but he doesn't want them to heal, or they would itch again. He pants in excitement, one could not understand the satisfying tremors of fulfill ness that rivets throughout his entire core at this moment. "Awesome" Quatre breathes, as he frantically begins to pick, scrape and dig into his wounds. Deeper, and deeper and harsher and harsher; he plunges his way into his flesh. "More, more wounds, please," he pants.  
  
The monster stirs slightly, "Quatre."  
  
Sudden rage begins to fill his body to a wild peak. His repressed emotions collapse; before the monster spoke, every thing was so quiet. His scars felt so wonderful. The monster interrupted him. Why did he interrupt him!  
  
"Get away from me!" Quatre screams, as slashes of pain rivet throughout his entire carcass.  
  
"Quatre." The monster becomes startled. He mustn't let Quatre realize that he could defeat him easily. "No!" Quatre voice breaks and he's on the verge of insanity. "Get out.Get out of me. It hurt too much, you didn't take away my pain, and you only intensified it. Leave me alone!"  
  
There is silence. The monster began to dissipates, "Fine, die, see if I care," The monster snarls. He rips himself from Quatre. Quatre cries out in agonizing pain for a long time that feels like eternity as the monster vanishes out of his system.  
  
Quatre breathes in raggedly. The tears on his face dry as he sits in the spot for a long time. He feels death near. He turns his head toward his doorframe. Heero leans against the frame, watching him.  
  
"Felt good?" Heero spoke, a mocking smile resting on his mouth.  
  
End 


End file.
